"Because it was actually that bad.  And because I knew my own limits, and that to test those limits was to risk myself and my intended rulership of Cheliax.  Cheliax needed me to ascend the throne much more than Cheliax needed me to be ninth-circle."

"You aren't quite that important, but you're getting there.  You could go back, Carissa, without breaking, but Cheliax can't spare you that long."

"Because it was actually that bad.  And because I knew my own limits, and that to test those limits was to risk myself and my intended rulership of Cheliax.  Cheliax needed me to ascend the throne much more than Cheliax needed me to be ninth-circle when I did."

"You aren't quite that important, but you're getting there.  You could go back, Carissa, without breaking, but Cheliax can't spare you that long, not even for your fifth circle.  When things have quieted, eventually, we'll send you off on a proper adventure, with due incentives around success and failure, since you need hardly fear death."

"Because it was actually that bad.  And because I knew my own limits, and that to test those limits was to risk myself and my intended rulership of Cheliax.  Cheliax needed me to ascend the throne much more than Cheliax needed me to be ninth-circle when I did."

"You aren't quite that important, but you're getting there.  You could go back, Carissa, without breaking, but Cheliax can't spare you that long, not even for your fifth circle.  When things have quieted, eventually, we'll send you off on a proper adventure; with due incentives around success and failure, since you need hardly fear death."